Non-Consensual BDSM Doesn’t Exist (And Yes, I Had to Argue About It)

Sometimes, I swear, arguing on social media is like trying to teach a fish how to ride a bicycle. It’s frustrating, exhausting, and ultimately pointless. But every once in a while, you see something so ridiculous that you just have to speak up. This time, it was an "educator" (and I’m using that term very loosely) who insisted that “non-consensual BDSM” is a real thing.…

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Years in Kink vs Experience: Time Alone Doesn’t Equal Knowledge

There’s a phrase I hear all the time in the kink community: “I’ve been in the scene for X years.” It’s often said as a way to establish credibility, but here’s the hard truth—years in kink don’t automatically mean someone is experienced or knowledgeable. What truly matters is what you’ve done during those years. Have you actively engaged, learned, and grown? Or have you just…

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Managing Jealousy and Insecurity in BDSM Relationships: My Journey and What I’ve Learned

Let’s be honest—jealousy and insecurity can pop up in any relationship, and BDSM dynamics are no different. In fact, they can feel even more intense because of the emotional depth and vulnerability that come with power exchange. But here’s the thing: it’s totally normal. What matters is how you deal with it. If you let jealousy fester, it can create tension, but if you address…

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Why “Age is Just a Number” is Wrong, and Why That’s Okay

I’ve heard the phrase “age is just a number” so many times throughout my life. It’s meant to be an empowering message, suggesting that age doesn’t define us or our abilities. But as I’ve grown older, I’ve realized it’s not entirely accurate. Age isn’t just a number—it’s a collection of experiences, changes, and adaptations that come with the passage of time. And honestly, that’s not…

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